Well Known Creepy Old Man Accuses Others of Being Creeps

Former Vice President really wants to become president. Problem is every time he opens his mouth, he confirms that he’s an out-of-touch old creep man.

Biden is battling to differentiate himself from the other out-of-touch old people vying for the democratic nomination. In an attempt to prove that he understands tech, he had this to say to the New York Times as he regales the reader about a meeting with Silicon Valley executives:

“…And at one point, one of the little creeps sitting around that table, who was a multi- — close to a billionaire — who told me he was an artist because he was able to come up with games to teach you how to kill people… And then one of these righteous people said to me that, you know, “We are the economic engine of America. We are the ones…” The point is, there’s an arrogance about it, an overwhelming arrogance that we are, we are the ones. We can do what we want to do. I disagree.

New York Times
Creepy Joe Biden

Biden is reduced to going back to the old “blame video games for all the violence” chestnut. Certainly, let’s not criticize his pals in Hollywood for the violent crap they pump out.

[Source: New York Times]

After 2 Shootings, Walmart Removes Violent Video Game Displays—Still Selling Firearms

I don’t want to open up a big fucking can of worms here, but seriously Walmart?

Let’s recap the senselessness.

  • July 30, two Walmart employees are shot and killed in Mississippi.
  • August 3, twenty-two people were tragically killed in a mass shooting in at a Walmart in El Paso, Texas.
  • August 8, some dumb motherfucker strolls into a Walmart in Springfield, Missouri armed with a rifle while donning body armor and military-style clothing.

Walmart has an problem here. So the dumb corporate fucks do the most sensible thing… Take down displays of violent video games, of course.

Many gun control advocates are rallying to get Walmart to at least temporarily stop sales of firearms. I mean what’s worse, a poster of firearms in the electronics section, or actual fucking firearms. Walmart, however, does not agree with this logic, as per spokesman Randy Hargrove:

“There’s been no change in policy,” adding that the retailer has been focused on caring for customers and employees in the El Paso community. “It’s horrible … what’s happened.’’

USA Today

Stopping sales of firearms, even temporarily, will obviously harm Walmart’s bottom line. It’s easier to just go back to the good ole standby that old, out-of-touch, limp dick politicians and corporations have been using for years. Blame the video games.

Pakistani Politicians Having a Tough Time With Social Media Lately, Apparently Don’t Play Grand Theft Auto 5

Shaukat Yousafzai

I hate to shit on Pakistan’s politicians when Washington DC is pretty much a festering dumpster fire. Regardless of which party you’re affiliated with, American politics is a fucking joke right now. This is FACT. I only WISH American politicians had the same issues of their Pakistani counterparts.

Take Shaukat Yousafzai (see above), who conducted a press conference with a Snapchat on. He at least took the entire incident in stride.

Khurram Nawaz Gandapur

Not to be outdone, secretary general of the Pakistan Awami Tehreek political party, Khurram Nawaz Gandapur, also had a bit of an embarrassing incident on social media recently. Mr. Gandapur tweeted about a miraculous near miss, when a courageous airline pilot pulled off some Top Gun level shit to evade an oil rig meandering onto the the runway.

“Narrow escape of an aircraft which could have ended in a great disaster. Miraculous save by the pilot’s presence of mind…”

Khurram Nawaz Gandapur – Twitter

Miraculous indeed. Just imagine how many San Andreans may have died if it wasn’t for this pilot having balls as big as Chesley Burnett “Sully” Sullenberger III’s.

Microsoft, Nintendo, and Sony Looking to Shift Production From China

Multiple sources have told Nikkei Asian Review that Microsoft, Sony, and Nintendo are looking to move some, if not most of their console manufacturing out of China in response to the ongoing trade beef between Beijing and Washington.

Sony and Microsoft apparently already have plans to ramp down current production, but that would make sense, given that new consoles are just over a year away.

A ramp down is to be expected a they ramp up production on the new hotness. It just appears that the new consoles may be made elsewhere, if President Trump and Chinese president for life Xi Jinping cannot come to a long term agreement.

[Source: Nikkei Asian Review]

Microsoft, Nintendo, and Sony Assemble Against Trump’s Proposed Tariffs

Nintendo, Microsoft, and Sony

Uncertain times can sure make strange bedfellows. In a joint letter to the Office of the U.S. Trade Representative by Microsoft, Nintendo, and Sony—the companies state their case as to why President Trump’s proposed tariffs on goods from China would be pretty shitty for consumers.

Tariffs on China could also mean more expensive hardware, but also the big three also claim that it could put jobs at risk, and stifle innovation.

I however, am a selfish prick and care about the possible 25% tax on video game consoles. New consoles are supposed to come out in 2020 and fuck that can be an expensive proposition.

Trade talks between China and the US are on-going, so this may never materialize, but regardless of how you feel about Trump, I think we can all agree, DON’T FUCK WITH MY GAMES.

[Souce: Regulations.gov]

I Played the Hillary 2016 Video Game, Now I Have Even Less Confidence in American Politics

As some of you may have heard, there’s a presidential election in the works here in the U.S. Things are going to get really heated between now and November 8.  The candidates are pulling out all the stops to get the vote, and some of them are going high tech.

This is the most interesting election I have ever encountered and not because we have two upstanding social servants vying for the highest office in the land.  Never in my life have I seen two candidates that are more unlikable and unqualified. On one end, there is the tallest and most aggressive Oompa Loompa the world has ever seen. On the other, there is a corrupt, untrustworthy, career politician, and carpet bagger. It doesn’t matter what happens in November, because the U.S. is doomed.


But enough doom and gloom.  There is a bright side to all this.  Hillary’s campaign just released a video game for mobile devices. Everyone knows millennials love video games, just look at the Pokémon Go phenomenon. So those in Hillary’s campaign took five minutes (probably literally) to create a mobile game.


Like most mobile games today, after downloading the game and launching it for the first time, you’re asked to create an account.


No thanks. I’m good. I’d rather just play. I don’t want to get bombarded by spam.


Then the game gently reminds you that if you want to play, you must create an account…


Christ, you’re a pushy bastard, but if I must…


All that the back and forth about creating an account was well worth it however.  Had I decided to simply decline and delete the game and move on with my life, then I would not have had the opportunity to witness the splendor of a virtual Hillary Clinton 2016 Campaign Office. Also, I used to burner Yahoo e-mail account because I’m not stupid.

Okay. Fake Yahoo e-mail address entered. Let’s get campaigning…. GODDAMMIT!


Looks like I’m finally ready to play this game. Let’s get acquainted with my new campaign office. Just swipe up to turn on the lights. This is actually the first time I get to interact with this game.  This is also the pinnacle of the type of interactivity one can expect with this game.


There’s not a lot going on in here.  I would expect to see more people working. Why am I here all alone? Where is everyone? Am I in some 28 Days Later post-apocalyptic zombie infested wasteland and I’m the last person alive? That sounds sweet!


I’ve been playing for 15 minutes and my campaign office was never attacked by zombies. Perhaps I should find something to do.  How about a game of Trump or False?


That sure was fun. Oh look, a plant needs watering. I can’t take the excitement!


Oh look! There’s a store front.  I can buy some furniture, new walls, and posters for my campaign office. Posters that no one except me will ever see, and chairs that no one will ever sit it, sofas that no one will ever lounge in, and walls that no one will never, erm… be walled in by.


I’m depressed now. I think I’m going to go take a nap.

During my nap I dreamed of a better world. A world that was peaceful and everyone was happy. I’m roused from my slumber by a chime from my phone. Looking at my phone, I noticed that I had a Push Notification from the Clinton 2016 app.  I rubbed the sleep from my eyes and opened the app, curious as to what the news may be.


I’m confused. The app that I downloaded yesterday and have played for 20 minutes (which felt like an eternity) is now telling me to download the app. I’m reading this in the app’s news feed. What kind of Bizzaro World black magic is this?  Is this some kind of elaborate psychological experiment from some secret CIA Black Ops program meant to break my will? What is the ultimate goal of this app?


Well that explains it.

I’m not going to beat around the bush here, nor am I ignorant as to what the ultimate goal of this app is.  The issue here is this app is a flaming pile of garbage and it has no redeeming qualities. This app makes the Kim Kardashian’s Hollywood game look like a masterpiece.

Even if you’re a Hillary supporter, I cannot recommend it. That’s why I give this one sad Robin Hood hat wearing Bernie Sanders supporter out of five.


Enjoy the election!